Yesterday Google sent me the following question “Why don’t women trust?”
The simple answer is Bristol Palin.
Well, to clarify, I can only really answer why women don’t trust me. The answer to that is Bristol Palin. Tender, thick, dangerous if under-prepared–like a pork chop–Bristol.
I have some very understanding friends. I have largely received grudging nods to [...]
How are you doing?
– My Mom
This is an interesting question and heady question. Usually it begins with a sandwich that looks like this:
photo credit: Sakurako Kitsa
After vigorous chewing the sandwich goo gets stored in a place I call the belly sac. A strong acid that lives in my belly sac helps break the goo [...]
credit: foxypar4
Recently it has been implied that I am racist; based largely on my post on monkeys hating white people. I also realize that a while ago I suggested that we should invade New Zealand.
I want to put to rest any questions you may have about my possible bigotry. Racism is the belief that some [...]
If you could make out with anyone living or dead who would it be?
One of those ethereal questions that comes up at parties.
I feel like the question is a trap. If I answer with someone who is dead I feel like I am subject to ridicule so I always want think of someone alive, but [...]
credit: Melissa Gira
Until recently I had a dream to be written about in Vallywag without a sex scandal. Apparently that is no longer possible. The one writer that is being left behind is Owen Thomas. I don’t know if he is interested in writing about me considering I am not a money player.
So, in a [...]
credit: boeke
My current most frequent search result: Is Love an Obligation?
Certainly, love is an obligation to not be an asshole, to shower on a regular basis, and to be the best person you can be for the people you love. The thing that crushes love the most is relying on other peoples love. Love does [...]
credit: Dunechaser
Is discretion really the better part of valor?
- I forget your name, sorry?
The answer is both yes and no. I think that it depends on your personal reading of the phrase. The popular definition of the idiom is this:
“It is better to be careful and think before you act than it is to be [...]
photo credit: ….Tim
What is the hardest part of growing up?
-CJ
There are a lot of hardships in growing up. Frankly, it probably isn’t worth the effort. Here is a short list of the things that you will lose while growing up:
Teeth
Vigor
Innocence
Virginity (only once if your lucky)
A sense of peace
Hair
What you get in return:
Responsibility
Bills
Taxes
Hair (in different [...]
credit: ♥ HunterJumper ♥
How do they fix a mans penis when it breaks?
-Tori
The answer to that question really depends on your definition of breaks. Do you mean stops working properly, like erectile dysfunction, or do you breaks like a bone? Since we all receive regular e-mails informing us about Viagra and Cialis I am going [...]
credit: / juL /
Why do Americans get so angry about politics? It doesn’t seem like many people even know what is happening.
-Someone who wants to be anonymous
First, do you know what truculence is? It is aggressive self-assurance, belligerence, a kind of bravado that falls, ultimately, on an arbitrary distinction. Dem vs. Rep; red vs. blue; [...]
