30
According to Matt Inman and the good people at OnePlusYou I could win a fair fight against 30 five-year-olds, approximately one first grade class. So that begs the question:
What would it look like for 30 five year olds to attack me?
My meticulous study of video games and monster movies tells me that either a battle [...]
credit: berbercarpet
Is there anything you can put on a cake that would make it less appetizing?
-Casey
In the grand illusions that so many of you insist qualifies as Real Life there are a handful of questions that shake one to the core. This is one of those questions: Is there anything you can put on a [...]
During a rousing round of drinks with some Internet friends we addressed the fact that Martin Bowling looks like a gentleman in his Twitter Avatar:
But looks like and Arby’s Sandwich in real life:
When I heard the question that I most dread:
Do you know who you look like?
The answer is a resounding, yes, I do know [...]
credit: Auzigog
Q: i want to see live naked girls but hate beaches and don’t want to pay $1 a song. what’s a reasonable way to go about this?
-Chris from Portland
Chris, since you apparently live at the intersection of pale and cheap the only real solution is to throw a party. Not just any party, but [...]
A question has entered my mind via Penny Arcade: How do you groom a girl?
Specifically this girl, Felicia Day.
Some women may not be aware of this, but, many men find grooming a woman very rewarding for both parties. Sadly, I don’t think that most women trust the meticulous juxtapositions and renovations of [...]
Thomas Roche
Why are there laws?
-A kid talking to his dad
Laws are made for one of two reasons:
Some things are illegal because they are fun (e.g. speeding, naming your kid Sex Fruit, or pretending to be a cop).
Some things are illegal because you can hurt people (e.g. speeding, stealing, or driving on the sidewalk).
There is [...]
How do you make out with lots of chicks?
-Sl4y3rX
In an homage to Jessica Hagy here is the answer to making-out with lots of “chicks”?
So there you have it. The way to make-out with lots of chicks is to to buy one, after another, after another, or volunteer for the humane society.
Alternately you can stop referring [...]
photo credit: musictowakeyou
I keep my phone on vibrate and in my pocket. Often it feels like it’s vibrating even when it’s not. What is the deal with these phantom vibrations?
-Jevan
Well Jevan the reason that you have phantom vibrations, sometimes called ringxiety, is that you are a nervous, self-obsessed person. You want so deeply to [...]
It has been over 5 years since we “accomplished” our “mission” in Iraq I think it is time we start thing about the United States next acquisition. Now I know that the popular thought is Iran, but I have a different suggestion:
Invade New Zealand
New Zealand has beautiful land:
Look at that view. What did New Zealand [...]
photo credit: samholland
Who would win in a fight Medeski Martin & Wood or They Might Be Giants?
-Chris’ Birthday Party
Well they both make a mean children’s band, and by mean I mean potentially damaging to the fragile psyches of potentially innocent children. Ultimately, there can be only one winner and it comes down to the [...]
