Filling In For Google

do aliens..
credit: v i p e z

I found this ridiculous image of Google Suggests and thought I should help out.

  • Do men have periods? Yes, of steroidal rage.
  • Does sperm whiten teeth? I don’t know. I need to do further testing.
  • Does Jesus have a tattoo? Yes, it’s a tramp-stamp.
  • Does jerking off make you blind? Only if it goes in my eye.
  • Do Virgins taste better? How are you cooking them?
  • Are Asians good in bed? In my experience, no.
  • Do albinos have white pubes? The real ones do.
  • Do babies poop in the womb? I hope not.
  • Do black people get lice? Only if we hang out with white people with lice.
  • Do blind people blink? You’re an idiot.
  • Do cougars eat snakes? Do you mean “Cougars” and “Snakes”? Then yes.
  • Do fat people fart more? Sadly, yes, both in volume and frequency…please god send a paper bag.
  • Do homeless people get knock knock jokes? Homeless people do often understand the concept of doors.
  • Do Mexicans celebrate Valentine’s Day? Do you mean “Mexicans” and “Valentine’s Day”? Then yes.
  • Do midgets have night vision? Let me ask @JoannaLord and get back to you
  • Do periods attract bears? My periods of steroidal rage have never attracted bears, but yours might.
  • Do old people have gray pubic hair? I really don’t know. I suspect they have hardwood floors.
  • Do Hippies believe in God? Yes, and some of them believe in Jah, who loves tiny sprinkled donuts.
  • Does sperm have calories? Yes, but it’s mostly protein.
  • Do red heads have red pubic hair? Only if they are real red heads. But, then they also look great in a pink cardigan.
  • Do aliens eat humans? That’s racist.
  • Does pooping make you lose weight? Yes, every morning.
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